Friday, May 2, 2014

Choosing Myself

I have been comforted and inspired lately by Laura from the Gluten-Free Treadmill blog. She is also going through stressful life changes and running injury issues and all of her posts feel like they are speaking to me. Her post "unhealthy" from yesterday resonated deeply. I feel like I am in survival mode right now and I need to prioritize what I need to be good at.

I am choosing myself, first and foremost. I am choosing to forgive myself, to treat myself and to let myself learn how to enjoy life again.

This got a little easier this week after my two big doctors appointments. First, the rheumatologist doesn't see anything that indicates an autoimmune condition. Second, my bone marrow biopsy came back normal!!! I am stoked about the news but also still a bit miffed at the lack of diagnosis. I had blood drawn at the biopsy appointment and my blood cell counts are still low. The next step is probably a follow up with my primary doc and a second opinion from another hematologist.

In keeping with my new motto to choose myself, I chose to put off those phone calls until next week. I need a break.

The best part of the experience for me was this:

I was a biology geek in high school (would've chosen this as a career if I could go back in time) and I think it's so freaking cool to see my chromosomes!


  1. Health uncertainty is so hard to deal with - I so feel you and hope you get some (good) answers soon! Thanks so much for linking over too!

  2. When you have potentially serious health issues, it has a huge emotional impact. Take care of yourself. And remember, when you're talking with folks in the medical field, you care more about you than the medical folks.

    I loved genetics in college. I wish I had pictures of my chromosomes. I think I may be jealous!